Wisdom in the House of Mourning

"It is better to go to a house of mourning

Than to go to a house of feasting,

Because that is the end of every man,

And the living takes it to heart.

Sorrow is better than laughter, 

For when a face is sad a heart may be happy.

The mind of fools is in the house of pleasure."

Ecclesiastes 7:3-4

A strange scripture? It never seemed strange to me. I have experienced it! When I was 18, my mother's father died. She adored him, but their relationship had become strained. She had separated herself from her parents and the aunts and uncles she grew up around, thinking they would judge her for her life choices. She believed she had let them down.

At the funeral home, I saw my mother glowing, receiving love from all those people. In her deep grief, she was comforted. She was happy. She was loved. Accepted. She was home. In that house of mourning, wisdom was there. She saw love and forgiveness. She saw God in a way she had not seen Him before. This wisdom and joy had been missing from all the parties she loved. This was real.  I didn't know about Ecclesiastes 7 then, but I knew my mother saw things in the right way in her place of mourning.

I saw wisdom again when my dad's mother died suddenly. He saw the reality that any of us could die today, and it frightened him. He saw the end of every man, and vowed to meet with the pastor and change his life. He was wiser in the funeral home than in the bar room. 

Last week I again saw wisdom in the house of mourning. You see, a house of mourning doesn't have to be a funeral home. It can be in our private prayer time. At our church altar. In any place and situation where we see His greatness and our weakness.

Our church gathered at the home of a young couple to pray. The husband had been diagnosed just days before with an inoperable brain tumor and given only a few months to live. What a blow to this family and to us who love them! But what wisdom was present there! In a room filled with over a hundred people, a hush fell as Clay shared about all God was showing Him in his own "house of mourning." He said he wanted only for God to be glorified through this, whatever the outcome. He said "I get it!" and everyone knew he was seeing something we don't see.

We, who were blessed to hear wisdom speak, hung on every word. Lord, let us take it to heart! Sorrow can be better than laughter if it brings us closer to God. 

I am grateful that we have a God who is the Healer, one who has given us more time to hear the wisdom Clay and Kristy are pouring out to us - really that He is pouring out to us through them. In our house of "mourning" let us take it to heart! Let us see You!

The Least One - Part 3 - More Fulfillment

Does this look like my study area? Lots of Bibles, books, journals and notebooks? Very familiar ...but neater than mine!

Not mine - but Madelyn's.  Yes, she's a girl after my own heart -- my heart for God, that is! 

Soulmates

I'm learning that my blog posts have to be narrowed down and shortened if I'm to make a point, but my week with Madelyn also belongs in the "fulfillment" category.

My first granddaughter! Madelyn and I have studied the Bible together via Facetime and shared many long talks. We have watched movies and read the same books. How could a sixteen year old be so wise? She ALWAYS "gets" it! She gets me! Both are us are introverts, but our love for God's Word has bonded us beyond temperament or personality. Beyond genetics. Across the miles! For eternity! 

On Saturday before Mother's Day, I received a text from her. I have received many that I copy and save. I ponder them in my heart. I tape copies in my journal! Because this one was the best - to be cherished- I've decided to keep it's contents to myself! Sorry.... I will say that it affirmed my heart's desires and blessed me deeply. It made me want to measure up. 

Seeing clearly the fulfillment of Isaiah 60:21-22 in Madelyn's life - (see my post "The Least One") I called her on Mother's Day to thank her for the text and to share the testimony I shared with the Doughtys.  It's time I started telling the stories of all God has done in my life! 

The Least One, Part 2 - The Fulfillment

What does fulfillment look like? On Tuesday, May 6, it looked like a gym full of young people in a public school praising God.

The week before Mother's Day I heard about a revival meeting Braden and friends were planning at the Denham Springs High School gym. One God. One City. One Purpose. 

A lot of planning and work went into the preparation. At least 200 people came. There were a few parents and grandparents there, but mostly high school and college students. The worship was lively! We prayed that this be the beginning of revival in schools across our country. And did I mention that God did this in a public school?  

During the meeting I was reminded and overwhelmed with my verse: "The least one will become and clan and the smallest one a mighty nation." Isaiah 60:22. I knew that here, in this gym, I was seeing fulfillment of this promise made to me in October, 1981.  

The service began with praise, then the announcer told how the meeting came to pass. He said that Braden Doughty had heard from God that they should do the meeting. I remembered that, in the years that Ralph taught the boys Bible study, he always told them that they could expect God to speak to them. God spoke to Braden! And he heard!

I have seen evidence of God's fulfillment of His promises many times, but some moments stand out. They deserve to be memorialized. To be pondered in my heart and written about in my journal. Some are written in the margins of my Bible. This is one!  

To fulfill means to carry out, to bring to realization, to meet all of the conditions of a promise or a contract - to satisfy. There is still much to be done - futures to face, lives to be lived, prayers to be prayed. The youngest of my clan are just four years old! Yet, I saw fulfillment - the bringing to pass of my heart's desire - for all my people to know Him.

Ralph and I have not been great storytellers. I decided that Mother's Day would be the time. As we sat with Jennifer's family around a noisy table in P-Beau's, I told the story of "The Least One" (see my last blog post.). I told Braden how seeing him hear from God and step out in faith is fulfillment of  my promise. I told them all that, however each one came into the family, they are my "clan".  

Braden, I am learning from you to be willing to share the gospel myself!  And for my clan  - it's not all up to me! I am no longer a "least one". I am a clan! Thank you, Lord, for hastening it in it's time! 

The Least One, Part 1

         Sometimes God takes His written word and causes it to leap off the page! This happened to me in October, 1981. Isaiah 60:21-22 has become the most-marked, most-read and most-prayed passage in every Bible I have owned. You might call these my life verses – promises that revealed God’s continuous presence in my life. 

A verse treasured is precious, but seeing it's fulfillment is priceless. Last week several events converged to remind me of that time and of all God did. A dear young father in our church, Clay Furlow, was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor. A prayer meeting was called within minutes of the news. As I rushed to the church, I remembered what He had done for my mother--of what He had done for me. I saw the past faithfulness of the Lord. When I saw the grief and fear in Clay's three children, I remembered my fear in 1981 and shared the testimony of the miracle God did in 1981. 

I was a busy thirty-three-year-old mother of three children, ages five, seven and ten. My mother was diagnosed with a golf-ball-sized brain tumor. I was doubtful that she had faith in a Savior to get her through. She had been raised in a very “religious” family but had turned away from church. Her mother never let her forget how she had disappointed her and my Baptist deacon grandfather.

Mama had made it clear that she did not want to hear about God and church, so I was hesitant to bring up faith. But faith was all I had! I did not want to frighten her by suggesting that she wouldn't make it through surgery.  I was fearful that I would not do what God led me to do – that I would let her die without knowing Him. A pastor and friend counseled me to pray for her if, and only if, I felt the leading and boldness of the Lord. Her salvation didn’t depend on me! This was probably the first counsel that told me to trust my heart and what the Lord spoke to ME, not in formulas or “ought to’s”.

          I drove to Gulfport alone. The day before the surgery, I had some time alone with Mama in her room at Memorial Hospital. Gathering all the courage I had, I told Mama that I knew that she had been criticized and condemned but that God loved her so very much. I could tell this touched her heart, for all she had seen or heard of Christianity, even from me, had been the hardness of self-righteousness and “religion”. I prayed a prayer for God to protect her through the surgery. I prayed that the results would be much better than we even dared to ask or think - like in Ephesians 3:20, “God is able to do abundantly above all we ask or think, according to the power that works in us.”  I told her that I loved her. I left it at that. I did not tell her she must pray the prayer of salvation.

I got up early to pray on the morning of her surgery. I felt so very alone. Desperate. I thumbed through my Bible and “happened to find” Isaiah 60:21-22.

         

Then all your people will be righteous

They will possess the land forever

The branch of my planting,

The work of My hands

That I may be glorified.

The smallest one will become a clan

And the least one a mighty nation.

I, the Lord will hasten it in its time.

          I knew God was speaking to me! I remembered the times as a child that I had cried out to God for my parents and for the husband and children I wanted some day – desiring more for my life than the turmoil and unhappiness I knew. I had this hidden life in my heart – Jesus. When we went to our fishing camp on weekends – I wandered around in the woods, clutching my little white King James Bible. I prayed. How alone I felt in my faith! Through this scripture, the Lord was saying that that this little girl who sat with other people's families in church and who cried out to Him would become a CLAN!  All my people would be righteous. All. And He would hasten its fulfillment! 

          As a child I sensed God’s presence and felt a deep longing for spiritual things. I admired a few Christian families and Sunday School teachers from a distance, but I had no spiritual guidance. My grandparents were churchgoers and influenced me, but even I could see that my grandmother was harsh to my mother, emphasizing “law” and “rules”, not showing her the love and grace of Jesus. (more about that in another story). Although I had walked the aisle at Grace Memorial Baptist Church and been baptized, I interpreted my relationship with God in light of what saw in my grandmother, as a “religion”. I began resent my parents.  Self-righteousness crept in. When I spoke to Mama about church or about her drinking problem, she got aggravated and said “you are just like my mother” – not a compliment.  The silent treatment followed.  She said she didn’t go to church because all they preached about was drinking. I remember sermons about John 3:16 and the love of Jesus, but I guess condemnation was all she heard and felt. I knew she was addicted to alcohol.  I knew also that my grandfather’s family had a strong history of alcoholism. My family life was angry and chaotic.

          The brain surgery went well, but the doctor said he was sure the lab would confirm what he knew already, that the tumor was malignant and that it had metastasized from another part of her body.  Mama, Daddy and I cried. Mama said that she was thankful because she had asked God to allow her to live to raise her children, and He had. When the lab report came back, the neurosurgeon was stunned to see that the mass was not cancerous after all, but a blood clot from a stroke, saying that the chance of this occurring was one in a million. The oncology specialist said “I spent days trying to prove she has cancer, but I can’t.”  I can believe that the doctor made a mistake or that God actually changed the substance of the tumor. Either way, I see clearly that He ordered the events and circumstances to make the greatest spiritual impact, to hasten the work He was doing, like Isaiah 60:22 said.

          While my mother was recovering in the hospital, my brother and his wife found a Baptist church near them, waited for the invitation, and walked the aisle, committing their lives to the Lord!  I can still remember meeting them in the hallway of the hospital that Sunday afternoon, their faces beaming They couldn’t wait to tell me! Mike said that I had always told him he needed to get saved. I don’t remember that! The next week my dad called and told me that he didn’t know if he would get “re-baptized” like Mike did (that was his understanding of what had happened), but that he wasn’t so dumb that he didn’t know that the Lord had something to do with Mama’s healing! The Lord was indeed “hastening it in its time.”

A few weeks later, my mother asked Mike and Nancy to take her to church. She must have thought a lot during her recovery, because, as soon as the choir began to sing “Just As I Am”, she rushed down the aisle with tears in her eyes. God had begun to fulfill Isaiah 60. I could trust that He held the keys to my family’s salvation and would bring it to pass! I admit I have had some doubts.  My mother’s alcoholism continued to progress and, although I saw a softening toward me, there was not a lot of evidence that God had changed her life. Still, I trust in the Word God gave me that morning of the surgery. He promised that “ALL my people would be righteous”.  ALL. Yes, ALL!

          God spoke to me on the drive back that I must not let all He had done that week be forgotten – that I should write about His healing of Mama’s brain tumor, of changed hearts in Mama, Mike and Nancy, and the story of His work in the heart of a small girl who did not know she would become a clan! This began my calling to write this story of my family--the story of the least one becoming a clan.

          Isaiah 60:21-22 has never left me. Its impact is always there. It is my core passage. The story of a little girl who became a clan unfolded and continues to unfold. How my clan has grown! There are eleven grandchildren! I see the fulfillment of my promise in their lives every day! How blessed I am! I believe my “clan” includes all who have come into my sphere of influence. The sphere continues to grow. Thirty-five years have gone by, and the Lord has given me more and more understanding of His character and His truth. 

          In 1981, there was no Message translation of the Bible.  It is not one I use regularly, but you will love this version of “my verse”!

The runt will become a great tribe,

The weakling become a strong nation.

I am God.

At the right time I’ll make it happen.

         

The Desires of My Heart

This morning while lying in my bed, slowly waking up, I found myself falling into what could be called "default praying" - praying anxious prayers of protection and well-being for my kids. Even in my early morning stupor, I began to see the dysfunction in this prayer habit. As I had for so many years, I was striving to build safe little cocoons to shelter, comfort and keep each of my "peeps",  as I like to call my children and grandchildren. And, I sometimes still consider them MY peeps - MY responsibility!  It was if I was trying to surround them like feathers in a nest to coddle and keep them - a warm and cozy nest full of blessings, healings and protection.

Even Jesus acknowledged the strong parental protective urge in Luke 13:34 as He expressed His intense feelings toward Jerusalem.  “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones those sent to her! How often I wanted to gather your children together, just as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you would not."

We all know that the chrysalis has to work its way out of the cocoon to survive, and the baby bird has to be thrown from the nest to fly. But as the eagle hovers over its young, so there is one who promises to cover them with His feathers and under whose wings they can trust. (Ps. 91)   But the security promised here is for those who trust fully in Him, the One who is the hoverer. For those who commit themselves to Him. For those who daily seek Him and dwell in His presence. Verse 14 goes on to say “Because he has loved Me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him securely on high, because he has known My name."

I thought I had long ago laid down the idol of  the "perfect Christian family" with perfectly protected and easy lives for all. But, in the process of continuing to lay down that idol -  perhaps it's time instead to pick up the shield and buckler of His truth. Surely, keep praying for their safety, health and happiness, but, even more than that, that each one learns to seek  Him and to dwell in His presence daily. That they seek His truth and commit themselves to His will and purpose for  their lives.

Lord, are my desires morphing more and more into Your desires? You did promise in Psalm 37 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and He will give you the desires of your heart."  As my own family has grown, the "perception" (and it was always just a perception) that I can control, even through prayer, every situation and possibility they may face is no longer one I can reasonably expect to hold onto! It was never reality anyway!  

Know The Things That Belong To Your Peace

"If thou had known, even thou, at least in this thy day, the things which belong unto thy peace." Luke 19:42

 

As Jesus came into Jerusalem on the day we now call Palm Sunday, he rode on a donkey, reminiscent of Solomon riding into Jerusalem as king. The Roman Empire was a cruel and oppressive system that had taken over the land of Israel in about 40 B.C.  The people of Israel were desperate for their Messiah to come!

 

No wonder the people shouted as He rode in “Blessed is the King who comes in the name of the Lord.” No wonder they rejoiced in the fulfillment of scripture that their Messiah and King was coming into Jerusalem – no wonder they thought he would immediately overcome the Romans and begin his reign of peace on earth. But he did not come as a conquering king - not this time - but to instead conquer sin.

 

He approached, Jesus stopped and wept over Jerusalem. He lamented that they did not see, on this the day that their Messiah came, the things that belonged to their peace. Their peace did not rest in defeating Rome, but in a Savior who came to Jerusalem to die for their sins, their deliverance, their healing. To offer redemption.

  

We must know in this day, in this place, the things that belong unto OUR peace!

Where does our peace come from? What things “belong unto our peace"?

Does our peace rest in political agreement or a problem-free life? In military strength or financial stability? In a good report? We all long for good news!

“He is our peace.” Eph. 2:14. He – Jesus – is Himself our peace! 

Because of Him, we know that our peace consists of:

 

• Remembering who He is
• Remembering that He is in control
• Remembering that He is with us
• Remembering His past faithfulness
• Remembering that He will come again!

 

Remember the Lord!

 

Ps. 77:11-14 exhorts us to remember Him! “I shall remember the deeds of the Lord. Surely, I will remember Your wonders of old. I will meditate on all Your work and muse on Your deeds. What God is great like our God. You are the God who works wonders. You have shown your strength among the peoples.” 

 

In the book of Philippians Paul wrote "And, finally" Since the apostle Paul packs so much into each letter he writes, when he makes a point to indicate that "this sums it up" we would do well to give it our focused attention.

 

“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” Phil. 4:8

 

These are the things that reflect His character in everyday life.

….THESE are the things that belong unto your peace!

.